Michael (DC): How have you not said a word yet about the Hot Dog Eatting on the 4th of July. If that wasn't a 9.5 or higher on the unintentional comedy scale, what is?Not to brag-- well, to brag a little bit. Just the other day, sailor jacket and fuckface were at my apartment to tear apart a bucket of wings, and we watched THE SHOW THAT SIMMONS JUST DESCRIBED. It included not only an explanation of what competitive eaters do, but computer graphics, AND real time pictures of the amazing things that happen inside Eater X from time to time. If that weren't enough, the show also featured Bubba, an eater wannabe who apparently doesn't find family life quite fulfilling enough, even though they seem like nice, thoughtful people. (I give his wife two more years with Bubba if he keeps this up, and no chance at custody). It's on the National Geographic Channel-- I suggest you check it out.Bill Simmons: I would love to watch a show that explains how these guys can swallow that much food while shoving more food in their mouth and chewing it. Seriously, I'd love to see a show with computer graphics that shows the inside of their mouths, their jaws, their stomachs and esophaguses and how the food gets processed to the point that it can be swallowed. It's absolutely amazing. And what would happen if someone choked to death during the contest? Has this happened and we just never read about it? Why wouldn't it happen all the time?
But probably not after eating a huge amount of wings. That was actually a mistake.
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